Our perceptions do not accurately reflect reality. If we saw what was really in the mirror we would see ourselves as much more beautiful, capable, and strong. My hope is to reflect vague pieces of truth about ourselves, our experiences, and the people we love. These thoughts will be reflected without mirrors so the true beauty of life can confidently stare back at us through the haze.

Pointless Ramble


It’s late, I’m still awake. I should be tired but my eyes won’t close. Is sleepy an emotion? When I feel other emotions, sleepy can’t get to me. Sleepy is weak. Love, nostalgia, sorrow, and joy (among others) are strong. I hold still and try to pull up a black screen. I can’t lose reception with the possible. Re-runs are running on all the other channels. My brain can’t shut down. 

It’s not a bad thing. Usually it’s a good thing to stay up just feeling. God speaks through emotions. 

I was wondering why I haven’t written lately. My inspiration was clouded by a busy mind. Worthwhile things, but busy nonetheless. I miss you keyboard. I miss you bright screen. I miss the spacebar under my thumb. I miss my thoughts coming out in sentences. Thoughts start to make sense with the quiet click of my keyboard. Unfortunately I have to hide a lot. Thoughts are very different in writing, they hide themselves.

I’m afraid that my writing is for me and not for you. But if you are one of the three people that read the crap I write I hope something comes of it. Today I write with no purpose.

I’m back Brazil. It’s good to be here again. I missed you too. This is so different, but today I felt like I was a missionary again. The same spirit. I talked to people who are investigating. I got to play with kids. I ate lunch at a member’s house after church. Then I sat and remembered. So many details came back that I had forgotten. Things I promised never to forget. Then I looked at pictures. Being back here makes me feel like no time has passed, I’m on a mission with no rules. In all reality, I’m always on a mission. This transfer is a little longer than six weeks.

Sometimes life makes sense. It feels linear and has a direction. Everything falls into place. I’m in the right place at the right time. A time that everything fell into place is now. Everything lined up perfectly. Florianópolis I’m glad I can call you home until December. 

The emotions I’ll explain another day. When everything falls into place again. When things make sense. For now, I’m just going to enjoy feeling. If you haven’t done it in a while I recommend it. Be nostalgic. Be excited. Don’t let sleepy shut down your beautiful mind. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular Posts

Truly Valuing Life as a Single Adult

Too often we fall into the trap of seeing our experiences as all - or - nothing . We might believe that if something doesn’t fulfill our full expectations of what it should have been, could have been, or what other people tell us it is was supposed to be; then it was worthless and shouldn’t have happened. This type of thinking causes a sobering devaluation of life’s greatest experiences. We owe it to ourselves to value our experiences (since they are ALL a part of our unique and once-lived life). Thus, there is a desperate need to eliminate all-or-nothing thinking patterns. If something was bad or difficult it does not mean it was worthless. Sure this is cliché advice, it’s advice that we give each other all the time. Despite our understanding of this concept in the abstract, I still see all-or-nothing thinking permeate our singles culture and damage our ability to appreciate our experiences. Each of the topics listed below are suggestions aimed at helping us truly value
Read more

Shooting Through a Sky of Fallen Stars

Image
"We are travelers on a cosmic journey, stardust, swirling and dancing in the eddies and whirlpools of infinity. Life is eternal. We have stopped for a moment to encounter each other, to meet, to love, to share. This is a precious moment. It is a little parenthesis in eternity." Paulo Coelho -  The Alchemist When a large piece of space-matter comes into contact with the Earth's atmosphere there is a streak of light that flashes in the night sky. The matter burns as it falls and from below we see a trail of dissolving, blazing, burning mass above us. As the mass disintegrates its remnants are spread through the sky in a dark and delicate descent. It's former life as a glorious flying rock has been forgotten as it has transformed into nothing more than dust. That flying piece of space-matter did not cease to exist, it simply changed form. It changed from a large piece of celestial brightness to invisible, falling dust.  Today, on May 8th, I will be married
Read more

The Pursuit is Happiness

Image
"Vivere militare est" - To live is to fight - Seneca There is an important difference between being comfortable and being happy. Unfortunately, most of us make the mistake of using the word "happy" to describe comfort and convenience rather than fulfillment. We believe that a nicer house, a different job, a bigger closet, better weather, a better car, or nicer clothes would help us be happier. In reality, most of our wants only help us be more comfortable or add a little more convenience to our daily routine. Many people have convinced themselves that they are happiest when things are easiest. If you believe this you are heading for disaster! Expecting life to get easier and happier as time goes on or as you achieve X, Y, and Z will inevitably disappoint you! This is because our lives will ALWAYS be filled with struggle no matter how "comfortable" we believe we are or will one day be. Once you get that brand new house, your dishwasher might break o
Read more