Reflecting without mirrors

"We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aids, but by an infinite expectation of the dawn, which does not forsake us in our soundest sleep. I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavor. I t is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts." Henry David Thoreau, Walden A few weeks ago a friend of mine called me from college. She had just moved to a new city, chosen a new major, and was trying to make new friends. This is an unsettling (and exciting) experience for anyone. She began to tell me about her frustrations. Needless to say, she was having a hard time. I noticed that the word "should" was used in al...

"The Earth is crammed with heaven, and every common bush afire with God; but only he who sees, takes off his shoes. The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries." -Elizabeth Barrett Browning If you believe in God, you believe in a creator. A being so intelligent that He was able to organize this Earth. An Earth in which every piece is beyond any one person's understanding. People spend their entire lives becoming an expert on one piece of this creation and they still have unanswered questions. If you believe in God, you believe in a being that intelligent.  Why then, do the believers often question God's ability to make their life beautiful? If he can create a world as complex as this, then why do we hesitate to put our trust in him? Why do we wonder why something happened? Why do we wonder when something different will come? Why do we think that our expectations and plans must always be fulfilled according to our own will? Why do we question...

This is a picture of a Cairn in the Uinta Mountains; I took it on my way up King’s Peak this weekend. Cairns are found along many different types of trails to mark where to go. As I’ve climbed a number of mountains this summer I’ve seen thousands of different Cairns along many trails. All have guided me to the peak. As does every college student, graduate, and aspiring adult, I have wondered what my path is, and what direction I should head. I’ve made a lot of decisions over the past year that I’ve felt right about, but most of those decisions only led me to other decisions. Then my complete plan (which I had felt good about) was quickly overthrown. With each decision I felt “this is my destiny, this is the right thing.” Obviously, each of those things weren’t my "destiny." But really, when I look back, each decision was right enough to get me to the next decision. Hikers rely on Cairns to guide them up mountains they haven’t been to. The Cairns are usually ...

Too often we fall into the trap of seeing our experiences as all - or - nothing . We might believe that if something doesn’t fulfill our full expectations of what it should have been, could have been, or what other people tell us it is was supposed to be; then it was worthless and shouldn’t have happened. This type of thinking causes a sobering devaluation of life’s greatest experiences. We owe it to ourselves to value our experiences (since they are ALL a part of our unique and once-lived life). Thus, there is a desperate need to eliminate all-or-nothing thinking patterns. If something was bad or difficult it does not mean it was worthless. Sure this is cliché advice, it’s advice that we give each other all the time. Despite our understanding of this concept in the abstract, I still see all-or-nothing thinking permeate our singles culture and damage our ability to appreciate our experiences. Each of the topics listed below are suggestions aimed at helping us truly value ...

There are some phrases that are universally good to hear like, “I love you,” or “you look really good today.” Although these examples are generally positive they have a different meaning for each person depending on their experiences. The phrase that I have realized I most like to hear isn’t always, universally positive. But, based on my experiences, it is one of the highest compliments anyone can give me. I am one of the lucky people who are proud when they hear this phrase. Whenever somebody says, “you are a lot like your dad,” I feel taller and stronger, like the withers of a horse. Whenever somebody says, “you are a lot like your dad,” I feel more caring and sensitive to the needs of people I barely know. Whenever somebody says, “you are a lot like your dad,” I feel capable of working tirelessly to make everything I touch better than it was when I found it. Whenever somebody says, “you are a lot like your dad,” I feel like I know how to fix anything whether th...